Sunday, October 24, 2010

Opposites Attract

I love my DVR. I'm able to control my viewing and actually watch something that jazzes me. Its been a long time coming.
I love documentaries, and I love the History Channel,PBS, and Nat Geo and to a lesser extent, Discovery (I liked them a lot better when they didn't have loggers, crab fishermen and myth busters as their line up). I don't really like "regular" tv. To be honest, the last sitcom I really liked was Friends. I don't like any of them on TV right now. The Big Man, does. He loves watching them and really bad comedy movies. My taste in comedy runs closer to Monty Python than the 3 Stooges. We don't like the same things, and that's ok. I try to tolerate what he's watching for the sake of family unity. However, I find it a struggle. Its been like that for years.
When we first started dating, I loved the X Files, he hated it. He liked Seinfeld. I hated it. I loved watching basketball, him not so much. He loves silly movies, I do not. I guess you can say I like indie theater, if it runs on Sundance or IFC, pretty strong chance that I will love it. And an equally strong chance that he will hate every blessed moment of it. So, I resort to DVR'ing it.
When the Big Man & I met, I was a recovering vegetarian. He is most definately a carnivore. There was no compromise there. He will never give up meat, and I realized that a thick, juicy steak can make me very happy.
I love to read, him not so much. I enjoy English mysteries, and a lot of artsy fiction. David Sedaris makes me fall over laughing. I worked as a manager in a big box book store for several years, and I was able to indulge myself in a literary fantasy. I loved being introduced to new authors, and hated having to read the new Oprah books for my job. I have an special dislike for one Princetonian Oprah praises, and that shall remain nameless. Lets just say there was one incident in Small World Coffee that stood out more than anything else. Big Man, on the other hand, does not like to read. Period.
I was always into the arts-going to museums, galleries, plays and that sort of thing. Once in a while, I still indulge, but not like I used to. Little Man enjoys that sort of thing because he's a kid, and the whole wide world is open to him. Big Man, on the other hand, is bored to tears the whole time. It doesn't matter what, he just doesn't enjoy it. Its his right and perogative, and I no longer try to force the matter. Since the Princess moved back home, I can ask her to tag along.
I love to hike. I have since I was a girl scout, although I learned long ago that my mother can't pick out a pair of decent hiking boots. Many years ago, I would go on hikes in the New England woods, which were especially amazing in the fall. I love fall, and I love walking through the woods and taking in the foliage and its changing beauty. I used to do it with our puppy dog, going to the bike trails or a park and just walk. For a while there, it was several times a week doing 2-3 miles. It was bliss.
But reality has come crashing down, and if we go around the block once every few months, its a lot.
Part of it is I want my whole family to go. Maybe just the little man if need be, but no one else wants to. So, I guess out of pouting or what not, we don't.
I get these notions in my head, of things we ought to do as a family. Mind you, there isn't some sort of rule book or guidelines or checklist outside of my own head. However, I would love it if we did certain things together. And I mean, I am not asking for trips to Paris or Hawaii or anything like that. I would love for us to go to church as a family. On a regular basis. It breaks my heart that my son doesn't feel the same way about church that I do. I would love for us to go the park and walk in the woods and explore as a family. I want our home decorated for each holiday. And to celebrate crazy ones as well just because.
Back in the day, I used to go for long bike rides too. My friends and I would go for rides along the tow path, from Lambertville to Frenchtown, and make a day out of it. There are wonderful bike trails here that I would love to take my son to, but I can't get both our bikes in the trunk of the car without someone showing me how to use the bungy cord. It hasn't happened, so we haven't gone. It would just be a glorious family outing-bring the puppy dog, walk along the river, have a picnic lunch, ride/walk-but its only in my head.
Before anyone thinks that I am unhappy or whining, I must say that I met the Big Man 18 years ago, and never looked back. It was love at first sight. Honestly, it was. I saw him and realized that there was something special about him and I was intrigued. I just thought he was incredibly handsome, and that there was something there that was magnetic. Maybe its because he is so different from me. Maybe its he's the yin and I'm the yang. Maybe its because deep down inside, we're more alike than we ever would care to admit. Maybe its the fact that we are soul mates, or something along those lines.
We create many happy memories in our lives, and I know that the Little Man is one of the happiest kids you'll ever see. So obviously, something is working right in our home. I may not be able to live out my little fantasy life, but my reality is pretty darn good.

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