Twas the weekend before Christmas and all the through the house, not a creature was stirring and mommy was burned out.
Actually I've given up on the whole holiday thing this year. I'm not into it and I am not going to pretend to be either. I'm just going to get through the next week and then I'm golden. I've got a few days off for Christmas and I can get stuff done around the house and get caught up on housework. That's the whole thing that's been bothering me-I've got a bunch of nagging to do's that aren't getting done and its bothering me more than I can actually admit to.
I'm feeling like things need to get under control at home for me to get my life back on track...I need to get back on the treadmill literally. I need to start to run again. I miss that in my life and its only been about 2 weeks that I haven't run. Its just this whole sense of things crashing in on me...and running is a way to clear my head I think.
So...tomorrow I plan on getting up and getting back on the treadmill.
Next up is admitting that there is some grief going on in my life. I feel a sense of loss after our foster daughter left-and I have not dealt with it at all. It was only a month that she was with us, but it was a month that proved my mettle and what I was made of. The hard part was letting go and knowing what she was going back to-that left me very unsettled. And I have to get beyond that. I can't really admit this to myself, because I feel like I'm some sort of wimp, but I am sad that she went home. I'm sad too because the little man misses her too. I'm sad because I feel that she had a good life with us and we with her.
There I've said it, the time we had with her in our family made us closer and stronger.
Now, 4 months later we're heading into the holidays and its a little sad for me.
So the countdown is on...no cards, no baking, not much merry making for me. But I promise I will try harder tomorrow!
Women of God can never be like women of the world. The world has enough women who are tough; we need women who are tender. There are enough women who are coarse; we need women who are kind. There are enough women who are rude; we need women who are refined. We have enough women of fame and fortune; we need more women of faith. We have enough greed; we need more goodness. We have enough vanity; we need more virtue. We have enough popularity; we need more purity. Margaret D. Nadauld
1 comment:
Dee, I read your blog with interest. It's not unusual for we Christians to stress out over the holidays... my advice.. after many years of beating myself up over not making the BEST Christmas for my children... Relax.. who cares if you don't get the Christmas cards out or the cookies baked.. Time is most important spent with your family... buy the cookies, no one will care... play games... chat with your sis and mom... and forgive yourself for being human...Ya know, you work full time and are so involved with church and most importantly your son.. he won't remember the cookies, but he will remember fun that you guys had... house is messsy? throw the junk in a closet for the Christmas pictures! and just enjoy the day! Before you know it, you will be a senior citizen and you'll have plenty of time to bake and clean! (but you won't want to... you'll want to see your kids and grandkids!) Merry Christmas !!!
Post a Comment