Hurt

5:30 AM and my blood pressure is already rising, and its not from a great workout. Its Thursday, so I am looking forward to getting through today and then its one more day until the weekend. I had a PTO board meeting last night, and there's a lot of work to be done between now & Tuesday. Yesterday was rough for the big man-he works a 12 hour day (which doesn't seem that bad until you realize he goes in at 3 AM). Then he comes home and has to be in charge until I get home, which for all intensive purposes was at 7 pm due to my board meeting. Needless to say, he was tired, and I am sure he is very tired today-we haven't talked yet-and to make it worse the noise level kept increasing in the house last night. Sometimes the puppy dog gets it in him to bark and bark and bark. He did just that last night. Other than a shock collar, I don't know what to do to stop it.
I will admit that I am tired today too. I didn't sleep well last night, but I know that I won't get any sympathy from the big man on that one.
I am also frustrated with the high school youth group leaders at church. It seems that they are not taking the silent auction fundraiser as serious as they should be. I asked for an email last night so I could get the bid sheets done. I got the email after midnight (obviously I was asleep)so its like they are trying to set it up for failure. There are so many things wrong with this situation on so many levels, and I feel that I need to speak up soon before there is a major situation. I am sure those 2 are very nice kids, but they are not strong leaders. And on top of it, they are not using the program they are supposed to be. That gets me so frustrated. The middle school isn't using the curriculum either. There's a lot going on as deliberate disobedience, and its only hurting the kids.
On a positive note, I found a great way to motivate the little man to tidy up after himself before bed. I set the kitchen timer for 15 minutes for both the living room and his bedroom, and we picked stuff up and put it away. The living room, which was toy covered, was done in less than 5 minutes. His bedroom, where I couldn't even walk in there was done in about the same amount of time. Were things put away perfectly? No, but it looks a lot more neat and tidy. Was there a sense of accomplishment? Most definately! In addition, we practiced our spelling words and knew them all. We played together with real toys (no Wii last night for us). We read 4 books together. Little Man mentioned that for the last few nights we haven't really had dinner time (its been all about grazing rather than dinner dinner)so that will be a priority today. I have taco chicken thighs already cooked-they just need to be reheated. Add some Spanish rice from a box, and some corn and we've got ourselves a yummy meal.
I know that there are a lot of things that I do wrong, and I am not always the shining example of being a wife and mother. I don't keep up with the house as much as I should, and I tend to get very frustrated very easily. That frustration level has been extremely high lately. I find myself wanting to scream and explode a lot more than I would have ever imagined me doing. I want to be more zen, but I don't really see that happening. I keep running down the to-do list in my head, and nothing seems to be getting done. I have been whining a lot more than usual, and I am not doing anything extra to plead my case to make it better. I just need to take a step back, and regroup the next few days.
Little things accomplished will build success upon success.
But my greatest success is when the little man is happy-that is my shining glory.