Friday, August 20, 2010


Its Friday, and I am at the tailend of my vacation and I am sad, because I have really enjoyed my time at home with the boys. I have enjoyed playing with my son, and spending time with the Big Man this week. I loved being the domestic diva that I knew I could be again.
Today I have some ironing to do. I actually like ironing, and for me its medtitative and peaceful. I put if off though, even though I enjoy it. I think its the fact that I don't seem to make the "time". There is nothing like a crisp, ironed shirt or pants. Actually, there is nothing like having my home life under control. I like the fact that the house is clean, and relatively uncluttered. I like that I have basically caught up on all my cleaning projects that I've been meaning to for a long time.

Some of the things I've learned from vacation this week:
1. I need a lot more rest than I've been getting for a long time. This means I need to actually slow down and shut my mind off. Its not just sleep that's restorative, its the slowing down overall that makes the difference. I do lead a busy life: I work 2 jobs, I am the PTO president, I have a home and family to take care of plus a dog and cat.
2. I can use the help if you're offering. I don't need to be in charge of everything, and that's how its seemed for a long time. It exhausts me completely. Other people can help without much issue. In fact, even if they don't do it "my" way, its ok because we are all working together.
3. I really didn't have a strong connection to my family anymore. Lately I've been the screaming banshee who storms around the house demanding people get up, get dressed, eat breakfast, get out of the house (AM version). Then there is the PM version-brush teeth, get jammies on, get to bed. Its very frustrating because it seems that no one listens to me except when I scream. But that's because things have spiraled out of control, mainly because of #'s 1 & 2 above. This past week has allowed bridges to be rebuilt, mainly where I am not the screaming banshee, a role I do not cherish.
4. I can keep up with the house and cooking and all that. Its not as hard as I make it through the day. I make it a lot harder for myself, and that's just craziness. I cause a lot of my own drama in my life. If I don't get all the daily stuff done, it makes it harder to do everything else. Basically, it really does take doing the daily stuff well, daily to keep the house clean and organized and humming along.

I feel like I did a few years ago, and its a good feeling believe me. I feel like I've got the whole world in front of me. Everything is wonderful now.

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