Bent

I love doing yoga. Have I ever mentioned that? Yoga is my sanity. I have noticed over the years, however, that certain poses cause me to have certain reactions. A lot of the time, there are deeply buried emotions that come bubbling to the surface and then I am forced to deal with the aftermath.


There are certain asanas that trigger emotions. For example, if I spend to much time in camel, I feel profound sadness. I mean, I can break down in tears, weeping and gnashing of teeth.

Pigeon pose brings about a feeling of anxiety. I can feel my pulse racing, and I start with that nervous twitch and sweat.

Garland pose also increases my anxiety.

Triangle causes me to remember all the things I’ve done wrong in my life.

Boat pose causes me to have an anxious stomach, and feel stressed out.

Warrior pose, while it should make me feel strong and powerful, actually gives me fits. I feel small and weak in it.

Yoga mudra reminds me that I am not perfect.

Despite all these emotions bursting the dam of perfectioness open, I continue to contort. I know that I have suppressed all these feelings until I can’t feel anymore. These asanas are a reminder of all the emoitions that have been stuffed down in my soul for years. I have been non-confrontational to myself. I’ve been numb for a long time, and I know its not healthy to do that.

The only way to resolve it is to get bent.