Last night I attended a Unity Day event for Domestic Violence month. It's an issue that I am passionate about, and have for about half my life. It started in college, when my RA broke up with her boyfriend. To get revenge, he torched her dorm room.
Several years later, I served on a special grand jury. One of the cases we heard haunted me, and still does. It was a woman who had suffered abuse at the hands of her socially prominent husband. He basically told her no one would believe her, and that if she told he'd kill her. She had the courage & strength to get out of the relationship and press charges. We, as the grand jury, were to determine if he would be indicted.
It was at that point I decided that I would work to make domestic violence history. I volunteered with Womanspace for a over a decade before we moved to South Dakota. I donate money and supplies to both the Compass Center and My Sister Friends House, two organizations supporting survivors in Sioux Falls. I'm in the basic planning stages of a V Day event for February 2013 to raise awareness. Its a passion for me. Seeing the fear in that woman's eyes as she recounted abuse on the stand changed my life. I don't want another woman to feel that way again.
Entering the main branch of the library last night, you were greeted with life sized figures bearing testimony. Each one represented a South Dakota woman who died as a result of domestic violence. There were too many.
At the event last night, survivors spoke. Professionals spoke. The US attorney representing South Dakota, Brendan Johnson, spoke. It was a powerful , moving event. It started with drumming, part of Lakota culture. [side note my son had never witnessed drumming live before, and sensory wise it was a challenge. He went to the children's section of the library and was fine] for me, the drums brought a level of sacredness to the event. It set the tone.
There were a variety of speakers. US Attorney Brendan Johnson, an advocate for women's rights and who has prosecuted thousands of domestic abuse cases, spoke to the changes being made in the court system. One if the challenges facing South Dakota is there are both tribal and non tribal courts, both busy.
A woman from Sisseton, who went from survivor to advocate with Sweet Grass, spoke of her journey. Chilling, and heroic, we need more people like her to share their stories and give hope.
Other advocates spoke, including a man who grew up on the Rosebud reservation and witnessed violence first hand as a child. He was about my age, and hearing him speak of how it's impacted him to this day tells of the lingering impact of violence on children. What got me was when he said that into his own married life, he slept fully dressed because he never knew if he'd have to leave in the middle of the night.
The speaker that made me think the most was the one that spoke about domestic violence in the gay community. It's not really talked about. There are a variety of reasons, which education and advocacy can help resolve.
The evening ended with a glow stick light vigil, in memory of those who lost their lives, those who are enduring violence and in hopes that no one else will have to.
Click the link to see pictures from last night's event:
http://www.argusleader.com/apps/pbcs.dll/gallery?Avis=DF&Dato=20121001&Kategori=NEWS&Lopenr=210010802&Ref=PH&nclick_check=1
